Disobedience
by charlottoundria
Summary: Sixteen-year-old Integra faces her greatest challenge since assuming the role of Hellsing's Director. Can she prove to be a competent leader and assert her authority despite the overwhelming stress in her life? Short one-shot. No shipping. Title is lame I know. Cover image is basic I know.


Integra hesitantly glanced over her shoulder to the empty expanse of garden before producing a cigarette from her coat pocket. She lit the end and took a long drag.  
Her work-induced anxiety began to fade from her system and she turned to face the back of the manor. She was at the far end of the sprawling gardens, far away from any prying eyes, and stood in the shade of a large oak tree despite the overcast skies. It was the late afternoon of a very taxing autumn day.

The smoking had started about a month ago. Her job had lately become much more demanding than ever. Despite having been the director of Hellsing for four years now, she still fought bitterly to demand respect from the Convention of Twelve and many other adults she had to deal with. Juggling with her job and her A-levels took away the refuge of sleep, so she had sought other means of coping with stress.  
She did not like the taste of the cigarettes; they left a bad aftertaste in her mouth and occasionally made her nauseous. But they calmed her nerves, and she was slowly developing a craving for the tobacco.

"A bit young to be smoking, aren't we?" a smooth baritone voice spoke from behind her.  
Integra was only slightly startled as she was now quite used to Alucard appearing out of nowhere. Her current reaction was nothing compared to when she first took over the organisation. Her startled screams and jumping amused him more than it cautioned him to desist.  
She stifled a cough and turned to see the vampire leaning against the tree trunk. He removed his hat and sunglasses in a gesture of greeting.

"I know Walter wouldn't say anything, but I still don't want to advertise it around him. It seems wrong somehow," she said before taking another drag.  
She thought that perhaps this was some normality in her life: a teenager hiding their smoking habit from adults. Although her smoking habit was born out of the stress of running a secret monster-hunting organisation rather than a desire to rebel, with her butler being the closest thing to a parent, she thought that her situation did not deviate too much from the cliché.

Alucard smirked at her sentiment.  
"Seeing as Walter started smoking at the age of thirteen, he has no right to judge you," he said with a slight chuckle. "Although that brand is rather cheap. Try to upgrade, master."  
Integra shrugged.  
"I'm a tobacco novice. This seems to be a popular brand, but perhaps I can try something classier."  
"And they sell it to you despite your age?" Alucard asked. Integra scoffed.  
"No one asks me to prove my age anymore," she said with a smile that did not reach her eyes.

Yes, Alucard thought that she did not look her age either. While she was youthful, with supple and unblemished skin and bright, piercing eyes, she certainly held no visages of a typical teenager.  
It felt inaccurate to even refer to her as a teenager. Her eyes were too sharp and too deep to be those of a carefree sixteen-year-old who would typically only have to fret over their schoolwork and social life.  
She stood straight-backed and proud despite the weight of her family name and occupation on her shoulders. Integra had been unable to afford to fret over the struggles of adolescent awkwardness and had quickly transitioned from a child into the young adult who stood before Alucard.  
Yes, this young woman who had taken fortune's onslaught upon her life with stride and courage, who had killed her uncle without hesitation, who constantly stands her ground amidst the patronising and contemptuous Convention of Twelve, she was surely worthy of being Alucard's master.

"How went the meeting?" he asked despite already knowing the outcome.  
"Awful," Integra said honestly. Her face betrayed none of her frustration as she had become adept in masking such emotions, but her brows still furrowed. "I have to fight tooth and nail in every meeting just to be heard, and even then I'm still scoffed at." She masked a cough again. "But I suppose this is the struggle of being a woman in this world."  
Initially, she had been reluctant to confide in Alucard about anything, afraid of showing weakness to her new servant. Only after he had told her an amusing anecdote about her father, causing her to laugh for the first time in months, had she been more willing to speak to him about her life.  
She met his gaze. Oh, how those eyes had intimidated her when they first met. They were utterly deep and seemed to pierce through her very being. She was yet to catch him with a vacant look; he was always attentive and intense.

"Alucard, you're over five hundred years old," she said in a questioning tone. He smirked.  
"I believe I am."  
"Tell me, do I have it better off than the women from the centuries you've lived through?"  
He glanced up at the dark boughs above his head for a moment of thought.  
"You can vote."  
"But democracy is a fallacy," she replied with an exhale of smoke. Alucard nodded in agreement.  
"You might have been burnt as a witch once upon a time," he said. "But although the methods of oppression have changed, it's still the same sentiment."  
Integra smiled at him, looking more relaxed than what she had been before her smoke.  
"I can't give up now when you put it like that. I have to fight and struggle every day, whether its ghouls or systematic patriarchy," she said as she snuffed out her cigarette with the heel of her boot. Alucard grinned. It was never a dull conversation with Integra.  
"Well said, my master."

* * *

It was late in the evening and Integra sat in her office chair, gripping the arms so tightly that her hands shook and the knuckles whitened under her gloves.  
Her breathing was rapid and she was trying to resist lighting a cigarette inside the manor but stress was too much. Integra felt that she would either scream at the top of her lungs or smoke, and therefore decided on the latter. She impatiently tapped her fingers on the desk as she took a deep and somewhat desperate intake of breath. It caused to cough rather than to calm her nerves.

Two of her men had been killed that night on a mission. Their commanding officer had already reported the incident to her, so now she awaited Alucard's appearance.  
She had kept her emotions in check as General Ferguson explained how Alucard had defied his orders and had thus caused the two soldiers to be accidentally killed by the targets: a low-level vampire and a small army of ghouls holed up in an abandoned fort.

She turned to glance out the window as she shakily took another drag. It was a black moonless night. It had been the type of mission that her soldiers could have handled by themselves, but she had sent Alucard as backup. She cursed herself silently.  
He wasn't a shiny new toy to be flung into every mission, but she often found herself sending him to accompany her soldiers in case anything got out of hand. It had taken her at least a year to trust him on missions without her presence there. Now she would have to rethink her strategies.

"My master," Alucard said softly as he materialised at her side. She turned the chair to face him. He was without his hat and glasses, and his coat was torn. Blood was splattered all over him like paint. He was bent on one knee, an act of respect and perhaps anticipation of his punishment, but did not hide his face. She felt unprecedented waves of anger boil over inside her when she met his impassive gaze. His eyes showed no hint of remorse or the slightest suggestion of empathy.  
"Explain yourself," she said through gritted teeth. "Why are two soldiers dead? Why did you not obey General Ferguson's orders?"  
Alucard maintained his strong eye contact with Integra as he spoke.  
"His order was to wait until he gave the signal to storm the building. It was a waste of time to wait. I could have cleaned the place out by myself," he said calmly. His tone was almost bored. "So I decided to take matters into my own hands. I went in first, and those soldiers got in the way of the ghouls while trying to stop me."  
Integra's cigarette had fizzled out and she crumpled it in half, angrily tossing it into the dustbin.  
"Regardless of whether or not it was a waste of your precious time, you should have followed the orders of the commanding officer," she said with a visible effort to keep her voice steady. Alucard's expression did not change and this annoyed her further.  
"I do not take orders from petty generals and their pathetic soldiers – "  
Integra backhanded him hard across the face before he could finish his sentence.  
They remained frozen in place like mannequins, Integra's hand still raised and Alucard's face skewed to the side from the impact.  
Then she immediately felt mortified for resorting to such crude methods of discipline. But how else was she to punish him for such actions?  
In the past she had only verbally reprimanded him, but that had been for minor incidents, such as blatantly ignoring her commands, or for being generally disrespectful. This was the first time he had been involved in the cause of her soldiers' deaths. His impatience and arrogance had caused them to die needlessly.  
"Just leave," she muttered, her chest heaving. Without looking at her, Alucard disappeared from her sight, leaving her alone in the dark office.

* * *

Alucard lay awake in his coffin. It was nearing three o'clock and the manor was silent, but he alone could hear the frantic pulse of his master upstairs. He supposed she was having a nightmare, for he soon heard her curse and throw herself out of bed to start pacing around the room. Then he heard a sound that made him sit up: crying.  
Although he could hear perfectly from his dungeon room, he materialised outside Integra's bedroom door within a second.

She took deep shuddering breaths as she sobbed. He had not heard her utter such sounds even after her father's death. She had spent all her tears at the funeral and had not shown any grief since.  
Alucard remained standing there for a few minutes, to allow her some privacy, before knocking on the door.  
"Goddammit," she muttered from the other side. "Come in."  
Having thought that it was Walter, Integra was startled at the sight of Alucard entering the room. She quickly wiped her eyes and straightened her glasses. He decided to withhold a comment about there not being any shame in crying. She smoothed down her dressing gown as if it were her usual garb and faced him.  
"I would like to apologise for striking you earlier," she said in a business-like tone that was somewhat forced. "It was unprofessional, if I can use that word in this context. I'm sure there is a more conventional way of reprimanding you for your actions."  
Alucard could not help but laugh loudly. He was genuinely amused. His master surprised him more and more every day. Integra glared at him as his voice echoed through the room.  
"Excuse me, master, but I cannot accept your apology," he said still retaining his grin. "I deserve no less than the harshest punishment, and I certainly don't deserve any apologies from you." Integra folded her arms in annoyance.  
"Your sires certainly had no qualms about slapping me," he continued, retaining his smile but not concealing some bitterness.

Integra turned away in thought. Honestly, she thought that her ancestors had been cruel. Yes, he was a murderous monster and he had to know his place, but she could not find it in herself to subject Alucard to the same treatment. Besides, after all this time he definitely knew his place as a servant of the Hellsing family.  
Alucard saw the internal conflict reflected in her eyes.  
"Dear me, what would your father say if he saw me negotiating my punishment with my master?" He said with a mockingly scandalised expression.  
"He wouldn't say anything because he's dead," she said simply. She swallowed her pride and inhibitions before asking her question.  
"How were you usually punished for disobedience?"  
"Shot, burnt, dismembered," he said as if reciting a grocery list. "Regular lashings, and let's not forget the experiments."  
Integra did not hide her surprise. The harsh experiments she knew about, but she was unaware of what sounded like regular torture.  
"Well, I have neither the energy nor the time for most of those methods, but seeing as violence seems to be the only way to get through to you, I'll shoot you in the knees."  
He nodded solemnly, having accepted his punishment hours ago. But he was surprised when he saw her discarding her gown for a coat.  
"Let's go to the shooting range. I don't want to wake the entire estate," she said calmly as if they were going on an evening stroll. From beneath her pillow she withdrew her gun. It was a small but accurate pistol that wasn't too heavy for a twelve-year-old Integra when she first received it. He was slightly amused that she slept with it under her pillow like her ancestors had before her. She slipped on her boots and left the room with Alucard close behind.  
"What were you crying about?" he daringly asked. Her shoulders stiffened but she did not look back at him as she walked.  
"The same old nightmare," she muttered. "That coupled with my recent stress can reduce someone to tears."  
Alucard knew that she was referring to the recurring dream of Richard hunting her down in the dungeons. He felt an odd feeling surge through him. Was it the desire to comfort or protect Integra from further trauma? Either way he remained silent.

* * *

Once behind the building that served as the shooting range, Integra punished Alucard more severely than what she had originally intended. He remained silent and impassive as she loaded round after round into his legs with deadly precision.  
When no silver bullets remained she leaned back against a wall, somewhat out of breath. He had crumpled to the floor and lay face down in a pool of blood.  
For a brief and foolish moment she was worried she had gone too far but stopped herself from reaching out to him. She had seen him be reduced to nothing but a pile of limbs before. He seemed to take some sort of sadistic pleasure in letting an enemy eviscerate him.  
"Why did you disobey the Commander?" she asked quietly. She silently hoped that she would never have to resort to such methods ever again. While she had vented the day's frustrations on Alucard through this punishment, she had not particularly enjoyed it.  
There was a menacing hissing sound as Alucard's legs regenerated and the blood was sucked back into his body. He stood up, tall and imposing as if nothing had happened, brushing the dust from his coat. He looked at Integra intensely, his red irises practically glowing in the dark gloom of the early morning.  
"You are my master. I do not answer to anyone else," he stated simply. His upper lip curled back in a slight snarl. "I am a jealous servant. I will not share you with anyone else, nor will I share my loyalty with anyone other than you." He knelt down before the sixteen-year-old and bowed his head.  
"If I command you to obey someone else's orders, then I expect you to follow through," she said sternly. He dared to look up into her sharp eyes.  
"Forgive my disobedience, master," he said quietly.  
"Forgiven, but certainly not forgotten, servant," Integra said with a small smile.

Thus was the nature Integra's life: chaotic, unpredictable, and ruthless, just like her servant. She would not absolve him of his sins, but she would not make him suffer too much for them either.

* * *

Author's Note: This is the product of putting off work for university because I am trash. I liked the idea Integra starting to smoke idk. Also, while I am a huge fan of AlucardxIntegra, she is 16 here, and despite her maturity, I feel like that's a bit young to be shippy with a 500 year old Alucard. Please read and review :)


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